Between Heaven and Earth   von NanaSaintClair
                              ([Kaoru x Die] AU)
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                            Kapitel 5: Chapter Five
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 Thank you for reading & commenting!!! *huggies* 



Their ride inside the car had been in silence as Kaoru simply stared out of the
window. He couldn’t deny that he liked the fact that people were thinking now
he and Die had something going on. Everybody had tried to gain the redhead’s
attention but in the end it had been Kaoru who officially had scored. And
somehow Die was plainly his, counting out any sexual activities, when even those
Kaoru could have if only he wanted. So yes, technically he owned the red-haired
man everyone seemed to be eager to socialize with. 

Digging out his cell phone Kaoru had written a short message to Toshiya about
that he and Die had left. He hadn’t told him the reason though, too lazy to
explain the matter. Once they had finally arrived back at home, Kaoru slid off
his jacket and shoes, before he silently made his way into the kitchen. The
taller man almost mirrored all the actions, got rid off his shoes and jacket,
but decided to sprawl out in one corner of the big sofa. His hand mechanically
reached out to take a hold of the remote and he switched on the TV. He wasn’t
tired yet and if there hadn’t been so unutterably many people who had made him
dizzy, he would’ve surely stayed for longer.

Flashing a bright smile, Die was happily surprised when the smaller man joined
him on the sofa and handed him one bottle of beer. He held a second one for
himself and lifted it with a small chuckle. “Thought we could as well drink
another beer here, in peace.” He winked a little and gave a tiny smirk, before
he raised the bottle and took a rather big sip. Kaoru didn’t mind spending a
bit more time with his crazy guest, wasn’t that tired either, and just because
he was in a rather good mood today, he simply desired the Die's company. It was
a strange feel though. Usually he either desired the company of a male only to
jump one another, or simply to hang out with Toshi. Yet Die wasn’t that bad if
one looked closer and Kaoru would still prefer an insane guy near him than an
annoying one. “You haven’t drunk much yet, have you?”

”No,” Die replied merrily and lifted the bottle as well, doing it like Kaoru
had done and drinking a fair amount before he removed the bottle from his lips
and happily sighed. “There was only Toshiya who’d bought me another drink.
Refused all the other offers.” He smiled and started to discover the buttons
of the remote, happily surprised when he had found out how to zap through the
many different channels. He had been honest, but only because Toshiya had
advised him not to accept all the offers. Otherwise he would’ve been tried
everything. But loyal to his core he had done as the tall black-haired man had
wished. 

Pleased Kaoru leant his head back against the backrest and closed his eyes for a
moment. Only when some kind of familiar, yet very disturbing noises reached his
ears, he opened one eye in suspicion. That Die had found the late night porn
wasn’t that surprising, but that Kaoru was now forced to listen to a woman’s
wails of pleasure wasn’t something exactly enjoyable for a gay man. He opened
both his eyes and checked for Die’s reaction. The question whether he was
attracted to the one or the other gender was still unanswered and in his case
it’d even be believable if Kaoru found out that Die didn’t react to any
gender at all. But still the lawyer would love to know, if he was honest and
that’s why he observed the redhead closely and in silence.

At the other end of the sofa Die observed something completely different but
just as closely. He had never really watched how humans did that. When he had
been an angel, he had seen them kissing and basically knew what they had to do
in order to reproduce. Tilting his head, he still wondered why the humankind was
showing something like this on their TV program. It didn’t look that healthy
to him, especially since that European-looking guy had an equipment that was
undeniably huge. Die’s gaze dropped down to his pants and his brows furrowed,
thoughtfully contemplating why he didn’t have a penis of that size. But then
he didn’t care that much, raised his eyes and kept watching the couple on the
screen. 

It was hard for Kaoru not to allow his jaw to drop at the utter sight of his
red-haired companion who was looking completely silly sitting there and
measuring himself. It was just too obvious that he was doing exactly that and if
Kaoru weren’t just so simply baffled about the whole fact, he would’ve
laughed as hard as never before in his entire life. It was just too amusing!
When Die was looking down at himself, the other man wondered though, if possibly
it had been because it had stirred something in his pants. Which meant that
obviously the red-haired guy was reacting to the straight style porn. How
disappointing and yet something that should not matter to Kaoru.

But Die was far from being aroused. Instead he had grown more or less shocked
with each minute passing. “Kao? Why is that, that the woman screams so loud?
Is she in pain?” He cast his eyes sideway, an inquiring gaze addressed at the
other man.

Biting the insides of his cheeks, Kaoru tried hard not to laugh at this, but had
enough self-control not to do so. He took a deep breath and shook his head.
“Well, no.” Was that enough of an answer? He had never been in the situation
to enlighten someone about the bees and the birds. Did Die really know nothing
about sex at all? Could that truly be? So far Kaoru had to admit that it was
possible from what he had come to know about him. “She isn’t. Not really. I
mean, well, yes. There might also be a little bit of pain but mostly she’s
screaming because she’s in pleasure.” For the first time his own speech was
confusing him. “Don’t you know anything about sex?”

Slowly Die shook his head. “Why would I? I just rhetorically know some things
but not why that woman moans that loudly. To me she seems to be in pain. Why
would anyone scream in pleasure?”

Hastily Kaoru ran a hand through his hair and took another sip from his beer,
before he felt ready to reply. “Because if you like something, you contently
sigh for example. And if you like something really much, the pleasure can be
that huge, that it makes you scream. Like screaming in joy. You’ve heard that
before, right?” Inwardly he was praying that Die at least understood THAT. In
a way Kaoru felt like being in a bad movie, having to explain such matters to a
grown-up guy. But then it was still amusing him that Die knew little to nothing
about sex and its bliss. 

Turning his gaze back on the screen, the redhead watched in silence for some
time, re-thinking in his mind what Kaoru had told him. It was logical. But Die
had never even screamed in joy, let alone in pleasure. Many things made him
smile in joy and that he knew pretty well. He was easily happy about things,
joyful when it came to events and simply someone who was driven by what he felt.
So what would happen if he felt something like this? Something that made one
scream out their pleasure. He cast a short glance at Kaoru sitting next to him
with an unreadable expression. “Have you ever screamed in pleasure? I mean,
really loud. Like she does.”

The question made Kaoru chuckle. Sure, he always screamed like a fucking virgin,
he sarcastically thought and smirked. He didn’t need long to come up with a
fitting answer on that issue. “No, but I made some guys scream like that.”

“Really?” Die’s eyes widened at the mere fact that Kaoru was capable of
such thing. Impressed, he stared back at the TV screen, watching how the couple
was just changing into another position, before he turned his gaze back to his
host. “And how do guys do that? They don’t have the same anatomy, that I
know for certain.”

He should’ve guessed that the question would come and that’s why Kaoru
simply scratched the back of his head lazily and pondered for a moment, giving
the impression not to be fazed at all. Not that he were. It was easier for him
to explain such matters in a casual way than to describe what straight couples
did. “Not much different, I suppose. Guys do have holes too, right? Plus a
dick to fill it,” he grinned a tiny, but arrogant smirk. “There are some
things you have to take care of, but when you do them right, it’s better than
anything else.”

That didn’t sound too bad, Die thought and it made him even more curious about
how it would really feel like. Staring at nothing in particular, he zoned out
for a few moment, only checking his options. He did have what was needed. He was
a fully functioning human male and so was Kaoru. And the latter knew a lot about
things like that, Die assumed. “I’d like to know what it feels like.” The
redhead cast his eyes to look straight at his friend. “Can we do that?”

“No!” Now this was probably the first thing in a very long time that made
Kaoru nearly blush as he could feel that it evoked a weird but warm feeling to
spread inside of him. Maybe it was just because of Die’s bluntness since
usually Kaoru was the one who bluntly stated what his intentions were if
necessary. But by the look of this stupid man in front of him, not even Kaoru
could come up with a smarter answer than his shot out No. When Die tilted his
head inquiringly, the other man knew the question before there was time to voice
it out. “Just because I say so.” 

Not a clever reply at all but Kaoru couldn’t help it. Yes, he would love to
fuck a virgin like Die. No, he didn’t want the Die that sat next to him with
those huge eyes staring back at him. That Die was for other uses. Besides, even
that naive bastard deserved some truth and honesty once in a while. Just that he
didn’t get that way of thinking at all. He sighed and dragged his eyes away
from the lawyer. Rejected, Die couldn’t help but feel a little bit
disappointed, and that his friend didn’t want to have sex with him made him
also a tiny bit sad, but Die wouldn’t be Die if he lost hope. Another idea
popped up in his head. “Then I’m gonna ask Toshiya. Do you think he would
like to?”

Eyes wide, Kaoru nearly choked. Of all things he hadn’t expected that. Even
although he should have, seeing how Die was obviously thinking about certain
matters. And hell yes, Toshiya would love to. Only that Toshiya wasn’t allowed
to. Not when he asked Kaoru. Would he? When things came to the worst, Die asking
to fuck him to be precise, then Toshiya wouldn’t think twice, would he? This
was crazy. If Die truly just walked up to the other man with that request,
everything would be fucked up in a matter of mere seconds. “Die, no.” Kaoru
shook his head. He needed to make his point clear, but possibly leave out some
true details. “You can’t just ask random men to fuck you. Not even Toshiya.
This isn’t something one just asks for. It’s... more complicated.”

“Why?” First Kaoru rejected him and then he wasn’t allowed to at least ASK
Toshiya. Why wasn’t he allowed to enjoy some pleasure too? Die didn’t get
that at all and he was on the verge of crying, really. A pout formed on his lips
as he stared at the other man with huge puppy-dog eyes.

Oh great. The situation got worse with every minute passing. Now Die was waiting
for an explanation and Kaoru just wanted to escape as his heart went out to the
tall, redheaded dimwit who needed some protection of himself. Sighing, he tried
to form accurate sentences while his index finger subconsciously started to rub
the bridge of his nose. “Because you never had sex before and having sex for
the first time is something special, or at least it should be. That’s why you
shouldn’t just ask whoever passes you by.” Kaoru was pleased with his start.
It wasn’t much different from forming a final speech after a trial. “You
need to wait for the right... person. Someone you fall in love with.”

Inwardly the lawyer cringed at the cheesiness of what he had said. It was true
but he had never lived according to that, not in the last ten years or so. With
a small nod of his head, Die wearily smiled. If that was the rule, he would do
as Kaoru had explained to him. But there was just one more problem. “How do I
know when I’ve fallen in love?”

Eyelids were innocently batting up and down while Kaoru closed his for a moment
and pondered what he had done to deserve this. It wasn’t that much of a
problem really but it was actually cute, too cute to stand. Deep down in Kaoru,
his conscience made him pity the man opposite him. “Well,” he decided that
it was worth a try to explain. “It’s when you look at someone and you’ll
become all tingly. Or when you talk to them and suddenly you blush. It’s as if
there were butterflies in your stomach and just thinking of that person makes
you smile and be happy.” He was almost amazed that he could still remember all
these things and when he looked at Die, whose smile grew wider and eyes took on
a dreamy expression, Kaoru knew that he had found the right words. “You’ll
just know when you’ve fallen for someone, trust me.”

“Okay,” Die instantly agreed and sighed, looking forward to falling in love
one day and hoping that he would. Only when his gaze shifted back on the TV
screen, his mind drifted to another issue that he knew about but had never
experienced. “What about kissing? Do I have to wait until I’ve fallen in
love as well before I can try?”

“Oh my god.” In a deadpan voice the words just slipped from Kaoru’s lips.
“Don’t tell me you haven’t kissed before either.” What was wrong with
that guy? So he thought he had been an angel and obviously he was still a virgin
but that he had never kissed before, Kaoru just couldn’t believe. Die was
lying, wasn’t he? All the crap he told Kaoru were just lies. Or then, he was
just the biggest loser or had really been something inhuman before. With
unhidden doubts he stared at Die who was looking just as clueless as ever.
“You’ve kissed before. Right?”

Vehemently the other man shook his head and assured: “No, I have not. I
wouldn’t ask if I had,” he said with a small shrug of his shoulders before
he went on with enthusiasm as his typical curiosity took over. “What’s it
like? Does it feel good? Do only lovers kiss?”

Intently but in silence Kaoru watched the redhead for some seconds, not
responding with anything at all. So Die hadn’t kissed anyone ever before. That
was either the truth or he truly believed it. There was just one thing the tough
lawyer didn’t like and it was when somebody tried to fool him. So either it
was out of utter generosity or to find any kind of hint in Die’s skills, it
didn’t matter to Kaoru when he had made his decision. “I can’t explain
that to you.” Or was it his own curiosity? “But I can show you if you
want.”

“Really?” Not just Die’s eyes but also his smile grew wider. The offer
simply made him happy. That was at least something he was allowed to try out and
just thinking of it made him all excited. He had tried to make people kiss each
other when he had been sent by Cupid and had always wondered what humans liked
about it. After all in Heaven angels never kissed each other on their mouths.
“That would be awesome.”

“Okay, then shut up.” That Die always grinned like a moron, didn’t make
the moment any bit more exciting for Kaoru, but he couldn’t deny that he was
amused. This was just for fun after all. He wasn’t seriously trying to gain
anything out of their kiss. It was more like a lesson he would teach the other
man. “Come a little closer and keep quiet.”

Die did as he was told, leant closer to the other man and patiently waited for
Kaoru to do something. A little clueless about whether he was supposed to purse
his lips or close his eyes, the general nervousness inside of him grew but he
tried to remain silent. Kaoru shifted closer as well and locked his gaze with
Die’s, as he brought his face near, one hand touching the other man’s jaw.
There was no turning back now and seeing how unfazed Die appeared, Kaoru wanted
to leave him like he usually left his lovers – in awe. He closed the last gap
between them and cast his lips across Die’s, softly tugging at the bottom lip,
nipping it delicately. 

It evoked a tingling sensation within the former angel, it tickled a little and
made him open his lips on their own accord. At the touch of Kaoru’s tongue
running across his lips, another new but exciting sensation ran through Die’s
veins, his every pore, his whole being, and made his fingers feel like
trembling. But that was just the start because suddenly this wasn’t even
important anymore, the feel of the very same tongue inside his mouth
overpowering everything else. Like his mind had gone blank, shut off from the
intense experience, so fell his eyelids shut as he poked out his tongue to meet
Kaoru’s. That indeed felt good. Weird but good. 

Gathering all of his possible skills in kissing and summing up even all the
gentleness he probably possessed, Kaoru gave this kiss his best shot. Oh damn
yes, he wanted to leave Die breathless, wanted this inexperienced jackanapes go
through the sensation of the best kiss he would ever get, before Kaoru finally
pulled away with a little, a satisfied smirk lingering upon his lips. Hardly
apart, he opened his eyes and observed the flushed face in front of him, the
still opened, lush lips, wet and slightly swollen. That was it. That should show
the red-haired guy what it COULD feel like when kissing.

A small sound of disappointment left Die’s mouth. He hadn’t expected it to
end so soon, wasn’t ready to stop kissing. This had been too good to stop now!
He was just about to figure out how to respond properly when Kaoru had pulled
away. No, Die was not finished yet. Without thinking, he leant close again, not
even opening his eyes, driven by the want to feel these lips once again. And
luckily Kaoru wasn’t prepared for his move at all. Frozen, he took some time
until he actually realized that the glimpse of experience he had offered Die had
left him in want for more. But that he shouldn’t have. 

Kaoru pulled away and put his hand on Die’s shoulder, pushing him off and
patting it at the same time. “Like kissing, hm?”

His head bopped up and down with eagerness. “A lot,” he merely breathed out,
his voice sounding odd in his ears, a little raw and unusually low. “Can’t
you show me more?”

“No, I can’t. I won’t.” Kaoru shook his head and turned away to reach
for his beer, taking a few hasty gulps. He sure wasn’t as cool as he appeared,
Die’s taste having taken its toll on him as well. How could one person just
taste this sweet? With lips so soft and a touch that gentle. There wasn’t even
any need for Die to respond in a skilled way since his utter feel was making
Kaoru tingly and hot. But that he wouldn’t show the redhead. “That’s
enough for a first try.”

“Was I good?” He couldn’t help asking, too curious about whether Kaoru had
enjoyed it as well, maybe even as much as Die had done.

“Not bad,” Kaoru replied and cleared his throat in order to keep the tone of
his voice casual. “You’ll get better when you actually kiss someone who
loves you.” He was being this direct on purpose with a sudden urge to destroy
Die’s perfect mood and to reduce his naturally given kissing abilities. What
was it about him anyway? Everybody wanted his attention, he was always nice and
even a good kisser although he had never done that before. “I just gave you a
sample.”

“I understand.” Slowly Die nodded and smiled, even if he had hoped for a
better rating. “But you were really good anyway. It was weird but good. More
than good. I think I need to fall in love quickly and try to kiss some more. And
then I gotta have sex,” he beamed with a smile so bright that it could’ve
lit the whole town.

Closing his eyes for a moment, Kaoru just took a deep breath. No, he wouldn’t
reply to this now. He should just accept the compliment and let Die do as he
wished. He was insane! That was it. Once Kaoru had reminded himself of that
fact, he opened his eyes and faced his guest, forcing a small smile. “I’ll
call it a night now. If you want, you can still watch some TV. I don’t mind if
you do that quietly,” he said and tried hard not to picture Die watching some
more porn. Watching those movies had often resulted in Kaoru doing some things
when he was still an inexperienced guy like the redhead was. And imagining Die
to rub one out on his sofa was really not a good thought to go to bed with.
“See you in the morning then. No need to get up early.”

“Alright,” the other man smiled and wished his friend a good night’s
sleep. Only when Kaoru had disappeared upstairs in his bedroom, Die sighed and
lifted his index finger to touch his lips. It had been little to nothing, just
two person’s lips meeting, and then caressing each other’s tongues, but it
had evoked so many different sensations inside of him, that it almost felt
unreal now. Kaoru’s taste and the touch of his lips was somehow still
lingering on Die’s, even when he touched his mouth with his fingertips. And
this had only been Kaoru! Who Die liked but obviously wasn’t in love with
according to what he had told him. Because then he would feel it. How this 'it'
felt, was another question but Die supposed he would acknowledge 'it' as soon as
it appeared. At least he hoped so.

In no condition to focus on any kind of television, he switched it off and got
up, slowly walking into his room before he lied down on his bed. Fixing his eyes
on the ceiling his mind marveled about the nice new experience he had made until
finally, late at night, he fell asleep. But once the sun shone brightly in his
face the next day, he instantly remembered his last thoughts and smiled. Without
a clue what time it was, he dragged his bones out of his warm bed and stretched
his still sleepy body. He felt odd after he had stupidly slept without to
undress and, wondering if his friend was already up, he decided to get a shower
this morning. He had liked that after all and somehow his human flesh desired
some water. 

Lazily he walked outside and checked in the living room if there was any sign of
Kaoru but since he didn’t spot the other man, he just headed for the bathroom.
A grin appeared on his face as soon as he stepped inside. There was Kaoru.
“Good morning!”

“Morning,” the other man sneered as he sat in the bathtub, trying to relax
his body in the hot water. “It’s way after morning but anyway. You’ve
slept well I suppose.”

“Yeah, I did,” Die responded and headed for the toilet first. After that he
turned back to look at his host, curiously observing Kaoru taking a bath. Of
course Die knew about bathing but he had never touched the foam-like substance
covering the water. His natural drive to get to know more about it kicked in and
he headed straightforward, kneeling down in front of the bathtub.

One of Kaoru’s eyebrows skeptically rose when Die poked his index finger into
the foam. But he decided to occupy the other man otherwise, since the lawyer had
just been thinking about something totally different again. “Now that you’re
finally up, do me a favor and bring me a document, will you? It’s on my desk
and I haven’t read it yet. It’s from Hiroshi Nagatomi.”

Nodding firmly twice, Die got on his feet and quickly scampered out of the
bathroom to fetch the mail. His eyes scanned the desk and once he had found the
one big envelope addressed to Kaoru and sent by Hiroshi Nagatomi, he snatched it
with both his hands and made his way back to the lawyer. 

“Open it,” Kaoru ordered and lit himself a cigarette, leaning back and just
enjoying his bath. He had reminded himself that he hosted Die for a reason and
why would Kaoru do all the work himself then? That he was bathing all the while
didn’t matter either. There was no abashment between them; shouldn’t be
anyway after he had found the redhead stark naked on a street. “But be
careful. This is important.”

Carefully Die opened the brown envelope and pulled the document out, on top of
it a letter directed to Mr. Niikura. “Shall I read this to you?” The
question was answered with a nod and Die went on. “Thank you very much for
your support and your willingness to sacrifice time and effort,” the letter
began and kept on making clear that this Nagatomi guy had really appreciated
Kaoru’s help. In the end it went on with a statement, that Nagatomi had
attached another check for quite a huge amount of money, just to express his
thankfulness. “Yours sincerely, Hiroshi Nagatomi.”

“Damn,” Kaoru muttered and took a last drag from his cigarette before he
handed the remains of it to Die who obediently disposed it in the ashtray on the
sink. Kaoru sat up slightly in the bathtub and rubbed both his flat palm across
his face. 

“What’s wrong?” The redhead didn’t understand what was wrong about
someone giving even more money to the lawyer. He had deserved it after all.
Kneeling down again, Die curiously stared at Kaoru while he once again was
poking his finger in the foam.

“Nagatomi isn’t a guy one would like to mess around with. It’s certainly
not a client I chose but can’t deny an offer from either,” the other man
tried to explain. “This money he gives to me makes sure I keep quiet and will
be there for him the next time. And sure as hell there will be a next time.”

“Is he that bad? I mean, do many people sue him? Not a lucky guy then,” Die
stated almost absentmindedly. He did want to know about Kaoru’s cases but the
foam inside that bathtub distracted him. Maybe he should forget about a shower
and instead have a bath himself.

“Yeah, many people do,” Kaoru just said and spared himself the rest, that
Nagatomi usually deserved to get sued, punished as well, but since he had
gathered the best lawyer around never made it into jail. “Let’s just hope
he’ll take his time until the next time.” He forced a little smile and
turned to look at Die, only then realizing that he was toying with the foam. 

Die smiled back and nodded. “Can I take a bath too?”

“You can scrub my back, that’s what you can do,” he replied with a small,
amused smirk but nodded nonetheless. “But you can take a bath as well.”

“I can manage both!” Die beamed and started to get rid of his clothes. 

Now THAT hadn’t been the basic idea and Kaoru tried hard not to stare with
eyes huge as plates. A naked Die didn’t impress him, not even if he jumped
into the same bathtub with him, but that he acted this blunt and totally
oblivious to WHAT he actually did, left the other man speechless. In record time
Die was naked and ready to get into the bathtub with Kaoru, who simply shook his
head, chuckled lowly and handed a sponge to Die. “Fine, then sit down
carefully. I don’t want my bathroom flooded, thanks.”

Taking the offered item, Die waited for Kaoru to make a little room before he
stepped inside, foot after foot. That indeed felt even better than showering.
The water was hot and somehow… soft. As if there was something else than water
in the tub. Slowly he crouched down and stretched his legs out at each side of
Kaoru, so the smaller man literally sat in his lap. The skin did feel nice
against his as well, Die had to admit. Then he simply started with his task,
placing the sponge on Kaoru’s back, and conscientiously rubbed the pale skin.
“That ok?”

“Perfect.” Kaoru couldn’t help his statement, pleasantly surprised about
how well Die did his 'job'. It was nice for a change to have someone attending
to this part of his body, even if it wasn’t the first time he shared the
bathtub with another male. But back then there wasn’t much cleaning involved
though. 

Die began with the upper back, moved down to the lower part and didn’t miss
the middle, washing along the curves of the spine. Then he moved on to Kaoru’s
shoulders, upper arms and even the neck. Being Kaoru’s employee really was a
good job, easy and pleasant as well. And also Kaoru enjoyed it, that wasn’t to
deny, and he slowly leant back against the well-shaped frame of the redhead once
the same was busy with his neck. Kaoru rested his head on Die’s shoulder and
he closed his eyes for a few seconds, the caresses holding almost an affective
touch as his heart began to pound a little louder under the cleansing of his
chest. 

“There too?” Just to be sure Die asked, when he paid his attention to the
front. He didn’t mind, not at all, but he didn’t want to make any mistakes
either.

Kaoru simply gave a short nod. It was almost like another challenge between
them. How far would Die go? How far would Kaoru let him go? Was Die really that
oblivious to what he did? To what they did. Any normal person would consider
that as sexual, probably foreplay even. That to Die it all was nothing but a
job, the smaller man somehow couldn’t believe at all. But he should be proved
wrong as the man behind him started to wash his belly, even when his hand had to
slip underneath the water in order to. It was getting far more interesting once
he reached the lower stomach and hips. But Kaoru tried to act cool. This was
just Die, the stupid bummer he had found on the road in nothing but his skin.
Nevertheless same one didn’t even stop at Kaoru’s lower regions and just
washed as assiduously as ever his crotch.

Shutting his eyes tightly, Kaoru tried to remain unaffected but he miserably
failed. Blood shot in his loins as Die unaware provoked a stirring between
Kaoru’s legs. No good. Not good at all. Defeated, almost in panic, he suddenly
raised his body and sat upright, taking some deep and long breaths. “That’s
enough.”

“Really? I can do your legs as well if you want,” Die offered with a smile,
not minding to wash the whole Kaoru and not just the upper parts. Besides, it
had been nicely warm lying together with the other man inside the small bathtub
with all the water surrounding them. 

“No,” he replied almost harshly and got up. “Clean yourself.” He stepped
out of the tub and grabbed a towel that he quickly fastened around his hips,
before he made his way out, leaving Die alone in the bathroom. What was he doing
for God’s sake? Why had he let Die take a bath together with him? Wash him
even! And why in seven hells did he respond to the touch? He was such a cool and
unimpressed guy in most situations, even in bed if he really wanted to, but Die
was just strolling in his life and messing everything up!

Carelessly Kaoru marched through the house until he had reached his bedroom,
getting dressed in a hurry. But Die wouldn’t win, Kaoru vowed to himself. He
damn was a pretty cool guy, much cooler than the other, no, any other, much more
desired by everybody else and he would not let himself grow weak for such a
dimwit as Die! He rubbed the cotton of the towel across his messy head and
sloppily discarded the wet clothe on the floor. Next he stopped in the kitchen
where he quickly brewed himself a mug of coffee, the caffeine always
appreciated. It was hard with Die, nobody would believe him. His intentions were
to make the guy work and not to bed him. In a way honest if one asked Kaoru. And
he really tried not to do anything with Die, not to touch him or to seduce him.
But how would you react when a gorgeous thing like Die told you he had never
kissed anybody before? What would you do if he just slipped into the same
bathtub as you? How would you help him if he had locked himself up in a toilet
cubicle? Yes, any sane gay would’ve screwed him long ago. But that was out of
question for Kaoru. 

He smoked another cigarette and drank his coffee, all the while pondering about
what to do. He needed to clear his mind! That was what he should do. With a
small nod he marched back inside the bathroom, grabbed the hairdryer and started
to style his hair. Once done, he faced Die who was busy toying with the foam.
“You know, the water gets cold. You better not catch a cold. Just fill some
more hot water in and sit until you’re wizened. I’m gonna go out. Don’t
wait for me.”

Kaoru didn’t wait for any response when he turned on his heal and made his way
out. He grabbed his jacket, cigarettes and phone and fetched the keys before he
slipped in his shoes and finally left. He didn’t even take the car. A walk
would do just fine. Fresh air was perfect to free his mind from Die. Maybe he
would find a solution that was acceptable for him. 

Inside the bathtub Die just scratched his neck and shrugged his shoulders. Kaoru
had been right. The water was getting cold and he turned on the faucet in order
to fill it with hot water again. But why would he sit until he was wizened?
Taking a look at his fingers his eyes grew wide. He really turned wizened. Was
that normal? If only Kaoru would be still here. Then he could ask him. But he
had said that Die shouldn’t wait for him, so he just prayed that his skin
wouldn’t look like this for the rest of his human life.

How much time had passed Kaoru didn’t know as he kept on walking and staring
down at his own feet. It was cold outside, a little chilly even, but he didn’t
mind. The air cooled him down, calmed him and enabled him to think properly. He
lit another cigarette and pondered. He had simply made mistakes. He shouldn’t
have offered to kiss Die. If that kiss hadn’t happened in the first place,
then Kaoru would’ve been cool enough not to react on Die’s touch. That was
it and it was alone Kaoru’s fault. In order to keep the whole thing to a
business relationship, he just needed to define some borders more precisely. No
kissing, no touching, no bathing together, not even going out would be allowed.
Eating together was the maximum of extent in which their connection should
revolve. And Kaoru should be perfectly fine with that. There were other guys who
were and would be happy to please the wealthy lawyer and once he was finished
with Die on the business level, then Kaoru could still have him if he really
wanted. Given that he would be still interested. Kaoru that was. 

The ringing of his cell phone nearly startled him and he was hoping that it
wasn’t Die who had figured out how to make a call. Reading the name on the
screen Kaoru sighed, partly in relief that indeed there was no Die calling him
but Toshiya, which resulted in the sigh being partially in annoyance. What could
it be that HE wanted to talk about with his best buddy? Probably about something
with a name that included only three letters. “Oh well,” Kaoru muttered
under his breath and pressed the phone to his ear. “What is it?”

“Am I disturbing you?” The other man’s voice was unusually small and
almost whiney. He hadn’t done anything wrong, had he? Lately Kaoru was really
in a weird mood, he thought and just tried to be patient with him, as patient as
he always was, maybe a little bit more. “Just wanted to ask if you’d like to
go out?”

“If I want to go out or if you’re gonna see Die again?” The bitter words
passed his lips before he had even thought about them. But it didn’t matter.
That Toshiya wanted to enjoy Die’s company was okay, but it still made Kaoru
feel betrayed. 

“Both?” Carefully Toshi answered, guessing that Kaoru was pissed that he
asked for the redhead as well. “I want you to come along, not Die. But I
would’ve still asked IF he comes along. He is your 'whatever he is to you' and
so the question logically crosses my mind.” True, Toshiya liked Die but in the
end Kaoru was his friend and he didn’t complain about him having a 'slave
trophy' living in his house either. The whole shit about doing a favor for a
stupid judge was hardly believable, even if Kaoru did a lot of things to gain
success. But keeping a guest and hosting him like this was very unlike the
lawyer. 

Taking a deep breath, Kaoru let his friend’s words run through his mind before
he finally replied, coming to see that there was no harm meant in Toshiya’s
question. “No, I don’t wanna go out,” he explained while another thought
crossed his mind. “But I wouldn’t exactly mind if you and Die go out.”
Some time alone would certainly be good for him, he concluded. “That is
you’d like to?”

“That a trick question?” The other man couldn’t help but ask. His friend
hadn’t sounded as if he would be pleased if he asked for Die’s presence. 

“No, it isn’t.” Kaoru tried to keep his annoyance low. “I’m just not
in the mood to go out. But Die might be and you are anyway, right?”

“Yup, but just to make this clear: I didn’t ask for Die in the first
place.” Toshiya was still a little suspicious. 

“I know that. Just make sure not to get into trouble.” He didn’t want to
use a phrase like 'take care of Die'. Not now when he was still pissed off.
Nonetheless he knew about Toshiya’s carelessness and Die’s naïve and stupid
nature. “And pick him up at my place. I’m not at home right now.”

“Okay, no problem.” He didn’t asked where his friend was since Kaoru
usually was everywhere and nowhere at the same time, always busy either
privately or in business. “Say, I’m just asking out of curiosity but why did
you leave all of a sudden last night?”

“Die wasn’t feeling well,” he just stated, not even lying. “But he’s
fine now. When you pick him up, take the spare key and keep it, will you? Even
after you’ve brought him home again. Alright?” Kaoru still didn’t trust
Die to 100 percent and Toshiya had been his friend for long enough not to mess
up with any of the lawyer’s belongings.

“Aye Sir.” Toshiya even nodded, although Kaoru couldn’t see him. “I’ll
just pick him up then and take care. See you another time then.”

“Sure.” With that Kaoru hung up. A small sigh escaped his lips. There was
relief in him. Yes, he needed some space from the redhead, needed it to come to
terms with his thoughts. Tomorrow he’d go back to work, appreciated routine,
and he would include Die as best as he could. Until then he didn’t want to be
faced with him or what kind of things he stirred in Kaoru. It was for the best.
Stuffing away his cell phone, he took one last drag from his cigarette before he
threw the remains aside and continued his walk.




-End of chapter five-

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