01 Reconstruct the Dream
My stay in this city had been full of travel and surprise. Colorful shops and markets, illustrous restaurants and a feeling of endless enjoyment had been my companions on my way through the city. However, no matter how bright the sun was and how harmonious my surroundings were, I felt as if I was being followed.
I pushed these thoughts aside, however, they immediatly returned, as a gloomy figure approached me. I tried to ignore him and pass, for a second I thought our shoulders might have touched, but as I lost my balance on the sidewalk and fell into the endless deep pool side on the liveless plaza, I slowly realized, that this was more then a mere incident.
To late. My already heavy clothes became soaked immediatly, and the cold water paralysed my body. Unable to properly move, I tried to keep my head over water, my eyes shut, so there would not be any water touching them. The attempt of getting rid of the clothes failed, and every movement made me feel as if something would drag me down further and further, away from the surface, away from all air desired. My heartbeat was suddenly all more present than ever, I felt as if somebody would create heavy pressure onto my ears. Darkness.
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Beautiful. To be desired. I could not help myself but track all her way through my city. This city, crowded and polluted with the abomination called mankind, yet her beauty seemed to change the entire color color palette of her surroundings. A few times she almost caught me. But I knew how to cover my tracks. And just as she stood next to the pool, I wanted to finally talk to her, Give me your attention, give me your words, your desire, everything. And even if it is just fear I get, it's fine. But keep me in your view!
But the desired glance is not given. You ignore me. I can see however that you have noticed me. You know who I am and that I know more about you than you could ever know about yourself. This ignorance however. This is not how you shall treat me. No. You shall be devoted to me. Devoted and at my bidding. You should be the one clinging onto every move I make, every vowel my lips form and every wish I send out into this world. Only for you to fulfill it. And I shall make you understand.
It may feel as if our shoulders merely touched, but it's enough to get you to loose your balance. I watch you fall. I watch you becoming aware. I watch you struggle. I watch you drown. And then I jump. There is but one way to make you mine. You will feel obligated to be by my side and eventually, after a few years, you may enjoy being with me. My world will be your world and all that cuts in, I will take care of that you will not be harmed.
I finally dragged you out of the water. Your body is still breathing, your conscience gone. Now to awaken you to your future fate.
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I've been rescued. But this person does not seem to be the saviour type of people. Just as I was about to get away from that individual, somebody grabbed them by the collar and threw them into the corner. It looked as if they had been shattered. Was my follower truly human?
My saviour clearly was not, despite their appearance.
We left the city early the next day. Our ways led through the inked calligraphy mountains. The brush strokes were bold, yet elegant. I could see big paths leading up the top from afar. As I stopped and wondered about how far away they truly were, my companion made sure to keep me going. No rest to paint. No rest to take in the scenery. We had a quest to fulfill.
Through the deep woods and forests, rich of dark greens and river sides, I stopped to watch the sunset. You could barely see the sun on the sky. But the reflection in the cool water of the river proved once more, that the sun was somewhere out of my sight. I asked to paint the view. I craved to keep the memory of this beautiful sight. But we had to travel on. We had a quest to fulfill.
In the waterfall mountains our slippery stone path led us into caves, with walls made of falling water, dark blue without illumination, but the daylight from our entrance and the watergate we would be passing through. My companion was about to pass through the thin falling cut of water that kept us from reaching from our final location. Mesmerized by the falling waters I reached out to touch them just once, before I would leave this sight behind me once again. „There is no time to remember every touch. We have a quest to fulfill.“ But as my hand touch the waters, the sheer force was stronger than expected. It dragged my hand down, sucked my arm in and I fell once more into a lake of water.
However, as I reached land again, a small platform on which my companion was waiting, they hesitated to reach out and help me out. „Why do you always stop? We have a quest to fulfill.“
„I want to quest to be fulfilling.“
– The End –
02 - It hurts, because you care
„Mama,...“
„I know, sweetie.“, the mother replied.
The boy looked at his pet, lying on the ground. „It hurts.“
„I know sweetie. But we can't change the way of life.“, said the mother, trying to calm her child's tears.
„I don't want it to hurt! I don't want to feel anythi-“ „Hush! Don't say that.“, the mother looked worrying into her child's face, she was now kneeling down, going on eye-level. „Do you know why it hurts?“ The child shook its head, clinging on to its previous statement: „I don't want to feel anything.“
„It hurts, because you have a soul and a heart. Your heart measures the time for your body with every beat it makes. But when it sees another heart stop, it becomes frightened of stopping one day itself. Your soul is everything that is truly you. Your body can ache and grow old. But your soul is timeless, ever young and ever wise. It is what makes you unique and what should always be with you.“
„I don't get it.“, the child said, confused by the mother's long explanation.
„It's good that it hurts. If it hurts, it means you care.“ With these words, the mother hugged her child gently. After that, they buried the pet in a respectful manner, leaving a place behind, which the child could visit anytime.
It was an alarming sound in the neighbourhood. The mother had just wanted to get her children inside the house for lunch, as the siren was heard. „What's the noise, Mama?“ No reaction, instead the children where dragged inside, the mother hastily closed the door, locked it from the inside twice. But to late.
The ceiling crashed, wood splittered onto the ground and with it, a tall figure made its entry into the room. „A.. a shallow?“, the mother whispered. „HIDE! Do you hear me? It's okay! I'll take care of it!“ Her kids fled the room, but one of them could not bring themselves to run further than just the next room. The tapping of the shallow's footsteps could be heard, despite them being clearly not heavy or with impact. It was as if there was a distortion in how the sound should be distributed.
„Don't move! Don't you dare go after my children! I... I.. know you don't care. But...you must have had a heart and soul at some point! Please... Don't...“ The child looked through the small creak in the door. Its hand reached for something to throw. Maybe it was a stone, most likely something else. I don't remember. In that moment, nothing mattered more, than that whatever the child threw, it would hit the attacker.
And so it did. The figure stopped mid-attack. But now it had seen the child and it went after it. The child began to run. Out of the room, into the gardens, but where to hide? The sirens were still sounding the alarm. The hedge. As quick as possible the child rolled into the thick bushes, hoping to be unseen today, as it had been many times while playing hide and seek. Had its own heart always been so loud? The breath always been filling the air with such noise?
The figure stepped outside. What had the mother called it? A shallow? As the threat walked past the hedge's side, the child pressed its face into the dirt, hoping to be seen even less now. Suddenly, no steps where to be heard, nothing. Not even the sirens. The insects and creatures in the bushes didn't seem to care one bit in the world about what was going on. They were just going on about their daily lives. Did that mean the threat was over? But the alarm was still ringing. Nontheless, the child let out a deep sigh, just in that moment something cold grabbed it by the wrist and tore it out of the bushes, onto the other side onto the streets. „LET GO! LET GO! PLEASE LET GO!“
And so, with cold unconcerned voice, the attacker replied: „Oh? Should I go after your mother again, then? Or your siblings? Which should I go for first? I'll let you have the choice.“
„No.“
„This was not an option. But if you can't choose, I will. I think, I will go for...“
„NO! LET THEM LIVE! LEAVE THEM ALONE! I... I... I know who you are... Take me! My heart, my soul... I DON'T CARE!“
The shallow watched in surprise as the child offered itself. It wasn't that this was the first time someone had offered themselves instead of others. But it was the words that struck a chord. So the shallow replied: „Don't worry. Caring will be the last thing you'll ever do again.“
And with that reply needles pierced the child's heart, until it vanished, and all that the child had ever felt anything about, started to appear without any reason to be concerned about, until the world faded black itself.
The next I remember, is waking up on the ground of a horse carriage. Maybe I was hurt, I don't know. I didn't feel any pain. But the person with me, they had noticed that I was awake. It was the shallow, dressed in a nobleman's suit. Telling me „Fix your eye“. And when I didn't react, he showed me how to. The moment I covered one of my eyes with a hand, it seemed to change, to alter or to heal. I don't think it has been that way before. But I didn't care. I still don't.
Nothing hurts. Time has stopped for me. My heart has stopped beating. As for my master... it seems as if he is enjoying himself quite a lot. But who cares.
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I don't know why, or how, but my soul returned to me. At least... a little. Maybe. Sometimes. I think. It's not that I care, but sometimes I do care. And I know there's only one way for me to be myself again. I need to kill the wicked creature, that has once started this misery.
But my master is not foolish or weak. Killing him, will not be an easy task to perform. But I don't care.
