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Velineyvra: Green nailpolish and a bookshelf on the floor





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Alle

Watch Sherlock, people. TV

Autor:  Velineyvra
It's absolutely brilliant and I will remain convinced that this show is the reason television was invented in the first place. 

All hail the Cumberlord. That would be all.

What. No. NO!

Autor:  Velineyvra
There I was, publishing new fanart, since my old stuff was painfully outdated. 
I categorized everything as I wanted it, actually spending time picking out stuff. 

Now Animexx has altered my categories. Aza is bishoujo, and Rand is bishonen. 

NO. NO FUCKING NO. 
I DON'T LIKE THE CONNOTATIONS THOSE WORDS HAVE. NOT ONE BIT. BACK OFF MY ARTWORK YOU BASTARDS. 
WRONG, WRONG, ALL WRONG. 

THERE WAS A REASON I REFUSED TO USE THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE. THOSE ARE LOADED WORDS, PEOPLE, IT IMPLICATES THINGS WHICH I DO NOT WANT ASSOCIATED WITH THESE CHARACTERS. 
NO, I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN TO TURN OF THE CAPS LOCK, THIS IS ON PURPOSE. 

WHY CAN'T YOU JUST TRUST ME TO MAKE MY OWN CHOICES? YOU ARE FORCING YOUR WORLD VIEW ON MINE, WHICH I HATE MORE THAN ANYTHING, EXCEPT THINGS LIKE GENOCIDE. 

No. Leave my stuff alone. I don't even know what other people put in these words. I googled a bit, and there are so many opinions and meanings. Why couldn't you just leave them as portraits? There are no doubt they are that, at least. 

Get away from me, you oppressive bastards. I do not like it when people to to force me to do things. I'll probably end up miscategorizing everything from now on, just to spite THE MAN. 

Fuck this. 

Just when you thought it was time to relax...

Autor:  Velineyvra
And then a fucking storm slash hurricane shows up on your doorstep. 

The lights flicker, the trees kiss the ground, the large panorama window shakes and the roofs creak. I hate storms. Well, I hate them when I can see or imagine how much damage they might do, which I can today. I imagine the terrace roof blowing away and smashing the cars (we can't move them, because the alternative is next to large amounts of trees), the window shattering and spraying my ginny with glass, and so on. 

I just hope we won't get a reprise of the 1992 New Year's hurricane. 

Okay, I'll stop whining. Hope you have a nice, non-windy Christmas. 


Status report several hours later: 
Boats sinking while at land. Part of the harbor being torn off, floating in the sea. Tree blown through an official building. Trees falling everywhere, including a five metres tall one in my back yard. I hope the cars wasn't too badly damaged. Roads blocked, lower parts of town is flooded. A boat ended up on shore, because of the wind and the high water. Every ferry is stopped. Electricity is out several places. We still have it, but it's by a hair - it's been out for several seconds several times. Roofs being ripped off houses and flying through the air. Being outside is dangerous, because of flying objects. Reports coming in of a house being taken by the wind. Several cars has been smashed by falling trees. Roads are closed, because being too close to the sea is plain dangerous. 
Seems like there's no casualties, luckily. I hope for better weather now. 

Merry Christmas, y'all. 

Freedom of speech is an absolute right!

Autor:  Velineyvra
Hi, I'm moving tomorrow and wasting all my time on the Internet! :D In all seriousness, I can't continue working until I've gotten this off my chest. I'll write to you when I can, Mich, probably during the weekend, when all is reasonably settled. 

Okay, where was I? 
Oh. Yes. 

Unless you've been living under a rock, or maybe in the US, you've probably heard of stuff going on in Norway. BAD stuff. I'm not going to write about it now, I can't. It's too much. The important part for this post isn't about that anyway, not as much as the debate afterwards. 

Recently, more and more people, online and in papers, are calling out to stop opinions from the extreme right side in politics from print. People having those opinions are being name-called, and politicians talk about removing the anomymous debate. 

People. This is so WRONG. 

We have freedom of speech, and I'm sure you all know what that means. If you don't, it means that I can say exactly what I want, regardless of what  that is and what other people think about it. 

It does NOT mean that you shall only say what the majority of the people agree to. It does not mean that you should adjust what you think and feel in order to get in online or on print. 

Sure, we might not agree to all that is out there. But 1) It's their right to say it, and 2) DEBATE, people. 
We get nothing if we just try to silence "them" and only let "us" talk. We need to talk together, all of us. We need to get all opinions out in the light. Anything else is just asking for trouble. 

And it's destroying one of our most important rights. 

You can't limit freedom of speech. If you try, it is no longer freedom. Would you say China has freedom of speech? Of course not. Well, it's basically the same principle. 



Another side completely to this whole debate is the people who think that no more anynomous debate is going to solve everything. Excuse me while I *rofl* a little bit. Eh, no. It's just going to make sure that less people is expressing themselves, in other words, less democracy. I'm not even sure I'd write anything here, if I had to give everybody my full name. Probably not. And I'm not even controversial. Besides, it's not hard to bypass that. Make a fake account, and voilà. 

This stings my very soul. Freedom. It's such an important value to me. 

Now it's all over.

Autor:  Velineyvra
Today was my last day at work. Whew. It feels so weird. I've been there so much since I started in September, and now there's a big piece of my heart left there. I love all of those kids, and after all this time, I know them too.

What makes them laugh, what makes them cry, what the wear or what they eat, how to wipe the tears away...
The kids I've spent the most time with made me drawing, and put some pictures in as well. It's beautiful. Miss Iowa(codenames for privacy, people), the lovely little thing, came over yesterday and told me that she had made something for me. But she wouldn't tell me, because it was a surprise. Today, as I said goodbye, she was standing in front of me. As I'm preparing to go, she makes a little noise, and lifts her arms up. When I bend down a little bit, she puts her arms around me, and leans her head against my chest. Oh, I was so close to crying right then.

And Buzz and Pat-man too, telling me they didn't want me to leave, it made an impression. Freyja saying I wasn't allowed to. Lois coming back from holiday, being delighted to see me, and not wanting to say goodbye. Rose hugging me every morning. Eliza liking to sit on my lap, telling me about her animals. I could go on, but then I'd have to come up with 60 codenames, and I'm too tired. Here's the ones I've already made: Miss Idaho, Capt'n, Elena Matthews, Queen Aryela - none of them were there, to my sorrow.

I kept looking at each of their faces, telling myself to remember them forever. I said goodbye to all of my coworkers (loads of hugs), and finally.... I walked through the building one last time. Seeing it with a different set of eyes, noticing other things than I usually do. The flowers. The drawings. The laughter. I went into the lunch room, left my last work list. Picked up my clothing, and put in all into my bag. Heard the gravel crunch underneath my feet for the last time.

Opened the gate, and walked out. As I shut it behind me, I did start to cry.

And then it was over.







The night is gone

Autor:  Velineyvra
Summer is here again. Kind of. Which means that the night disappears as well. It no longer gets dark, there's just dusk. It completely destroys my inner clock, but it doesn't matter. It's too gorgeous. 

And it's just something really special about being outside very late, when it's all light and warm, but no one around. Almost as if the world ended while I was looking in another direction, and now I'm the only one left. As I walk in the streets, all I can hear is the echo of my own footsteps, the wind, and birds singing in the trees. It's serene, in a way. 

August isn't that far off. And when August comes, I'm going to move. It's not the longest distance, just four hours, but it still feels long. Away from absolutely everything that I know. Of course, I know people there, but that's like two in an ocean of strangers. 

I suppose the trick is to stay true to oneself, even if that sometimes is hard. And get to know new people. That's going to be harder, I think. I'm a loner, it's no use denying it. I don't warm up to new people easily. And my idea of a great saturday evening, involves a huge cup of tea and a book. 

All I want right now is freedom. I'll try my hardest to get it. 

The dawn of the new day, eh? 

And I'm supposed to have sympathy for the idiots?

Autor:  Velineyvra
It's almost 01.00. I'm stitting at the computer because I can't sleep. 
And I can sleep because all of the bank employees in Norway are threathening with a strike. 

Now, normally, this wouldn't bother me. I can get by either way. However. My lovely friend, who I was supposed to meet tomorrow (or rather, today), will get stuck on the other side of the fjord, should this happen, due to payment troubles. 

I have looked forwards to this for so long, you idiots! Meeting both my two best friends at once. This is what makes my life worth living! The meaning of life, or as close as I can get.  And you choose TODAY to (threaten to)  strike! And what for? 

You have some of the cushiest jobs ever, goddamnit! You don't even HAVE to disable all the systems, they would work perfectly if you just chose a smaller strike. But noooo, here we have people who get three times my pay in a month who sees it fit to complain and complain, blah blah blah, feel sorry for us! 

Nope. No way. Burn in HELL.
Which is what I will say, should I meet someone from a bank on strike, if it happens. 

Studies

Autor:  Velineyvra
As of right now, I'll be studying psychology next year. I suppose I just really got tired of building houses after six years of redecorating non stop. I don't ever want to do anything besides painting a wall if I get my own place. 
Anyway. So right now I'm doing the stupid thing, I'm choosing subjects because I think they are interesting subjects, not because this leads to great jobs. 
But still, it all feels so right. And then I start to think about why it feels right. Though that in itself did give me an answer. It's right because so much relating to the subject is always in the back of my head, meaning I'll think about it even right then. [Then I laughed.]
I just really, really hope I'm not doing something stupid. Either way, I'll at least gain something, right? 

Argh, it's just hard, I suppose :P Deciding the future. 

Some thoughts about passion

Autor:  Velineyvra
Some things are just more important than others. To the individual, of course, or else this is going to derail into me talking Maslow. The guy with the pyramid. Anyway. 

I just started thinking about how certain parts of out lives are more important to us than the rest. For example, I love books. Recently, the local bookshop's basement was flooded, and my first thought was: "Oh no, what happened to the books? Are they all right? They must be!" Feeling kind of silly about that now... I love the creaking of the spine as you open a brand new book, the smell of the pages, the colours as they are all lined up more or less neatly on a shelf. 

In my opinion, a house without books is a house without a soul. And yet I'd give up half of my beloved books for this: http://www.shaftesburytheatre.com/shows/derren-brown-svengali

A dear friend loves battleships, a fascination that I don't share, but I still enjoy his joy. Because it's so much happiness there. So many strong feelings. [If you're looking for a point here, I can assure you there isn't one, just ramblings]

I don't know, I just really appreciate strong feelings, passion, love. It's just so damn nice to have something to care about to such a degree. It really doesn't matter is it's a band, a book, a show, whatever. 

It's nice being a nerd. 

It's nice to love something, even if most other people can't love it the way you do [but I've got to admit not being all by myself means a great deal to me]. 

And there's really not that much I can write when it's the middle of the night, and I should sleep. If you happen to read this, know that I love you. 

Edited: Holy shit, I'm really weird when it's late! This really began when I was thinking about people "reinventing" themselves as they moved to a new place, and realizing I no longer had any wish to do so. All the pieces are in the place that they are meant to be, so to speak. And that is exactly as I wish things to be. 


06.11.09. Changed my life forever.


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